Dullbloods, these are the people who lack the magic that allows one to learn & master skills at an efficient pace. Once discovered to be one when they come of age, one can expect to say goodbye to their old life & hello to a newer more meagre one.

Sometimes under threat of potato peelers to the skin. John Kettle, a dullblood living in the port city of Stackport, he has long since come to accept his lot in life.

Eking out a living for himself in the city's sewers, recently he had the pleasure of becoming one of the few dullbloods that can boast about owning property. But he should have read the fine print of his loan.

Because now it looks like he's going to lose his home & the only way he can keep it is if he delivers a sword to the city of David's Gate on the other side of the Split Rivers. But of course the job will be anything but simple.

He will face many obstacles in his way. From an elf that thinks he's a dwarf, a gnome obsessed with scotch eggs, feminist bandits to ogre rights activists.

He'll also discover that this job has tied him to something that could decide not only the fate of Stackport, David's Gate & everything inbetween, but also John's status as a homeowner. Includes bonus short story The Trial.

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